When we fall in love with that "special someone" the last thing we think is, "I can't wait to get divorced." Even then we don't think, "If I got divorced, I'd want to get remarried."
I believe a divorce is not really what they want. What is wanted is change. A good change, a change that will keep their family and relationship together in a way that will help them be happy. As we distance ourselves in a relationship though, we can choose fight or flight. We don't want to get hurt, so distancing ourselves seems logical. But as we do so, the more complaining that takes place, and the more defensive we become, the more distant we are. That will them turn into avoidance.
How does divorce and remarriage affect children?
- They have to decide which parent to live with, which can be traumatizing.
- Child can become a mediator.
- Struggles in school.
- A loss of resources.
- Try to please all the parents.
- There can be a lack of respect of step-parents.
- Guilt and shame
Also, the step-parent should give the role of being an aunt or uncle.
Marriage needs to be the foundation of a family. So work on the marriage is important for the family to be strong. No one wants to get married to get divorced.
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